FACEBOOK WILL END ON MARCH 15th!
Posted on Saturday, January 8th, 2011By J.B. Smitts
1515 Votes
“Facebook has gotten out of control,” said Zuckerberg in a press conference outside his Palo Alto office, “and the stress of managing this company has ruined my life. I need to put an end to all the madness.”
Zuckerberg went on to explain that starting March 15th, users will no longer be able to access their Facebook accounts.
“After March 15th the whole website shuts down,” said Avrat Humarthi, Vice President of Technical Affairs at Facebook. “So if you ever want to see your pictures again, I recommend you take them off the internet. You won’t be able to get them back once Facebook goes out of business.”
Zuckerberg said that the decision to shut down Facebook was difficult, but that he does not think people will be upset.
“I personally don’t think it’s a big deal,” he said in a private phone interview. “And to be honest, I think it’s for the better. Without Facebook, people will have to go outside and make real friends. That’s always a good thing.”
Some Facebook users were furious upon hearing the shocking news.
“What am I going to do without Facebook?” said Denise Bradshaw, a high school student from Indiana. “My life revolves around it. I’m on Facebook at least 10 hours a day. Now what am I going to do with all that free time?”
However, parents across the country have been experiencing a long anticipated sense of relief.
“I’m glad the Facebook nightmare is over,” said Jon Guttari, a single parent from Detroit. “Now my teenager’s face won’t be glued to a computer screen all day. Maybe I can even have a conversation with her.”
Those in the financial circuit are criticizing Zuckerberg for walking away from a multibillion dollar franchise. Facebook is currently ranked as one of the wealthiest businesses in the world, with economists estimating its value at around 7.9 billion.
But Zuckerberg remains unruffled by these accusations. He says he will stand by his decision to give Facebook the axe.
“I don’t care about the money,” said Zuckerberg. “I just want my old life back.”
The Facebook Corporation suggests that users remove all of their personal information from the website before March 15th. After that date, all photos, notes, links, and videos will be permanently erased.
MICHELLE OBAMA PREGNANT!
Posted on Saturday, January 8th, 2011By Frank Lake
76 Votes
“Michelle Obama is pregnant,” White House sources said. White House Press Secretary, Robert Gibbs, told reporters in Hawaii today that he would not confirm or deny the rumor. But WWN has confirmed that Michelle Obama is about two months into her pregnancy and the President and First Lady expect to have the baby sometime in late July, 2011.
There was a great deal of mystery about the whereabouts of the President and First Lady on Election Night this year. There were many rumors about where they might be - but now we know. The happy couple was spending quality time together, making a new baby.
The President and First Lady are “ecstatic” about the news of a new baby. Michelle Obama, 46, and Barack Obama, 49, waited almost seven years before having children. Their first daughter, Malia Ann Obama was born on July 4, 1999 and Natasha (often called “Sasha”)was born two years later on June 10, 2001.
It is too early to determine if the baby is a boy or a girl, but David Axelrod, the President’s Senior Adviser, said that the President is hoping to have a boy.
President Obama turns 50 on August 4th of this year, and there is a chance that the baby will be born on his birthday.
Tags: baby, David Axelrod, First Lady, having a baby, hawaii, malia, michelle obama, mother, obama, obesity, pregnant, robert gibbs, sasha, vacation in Hawaii
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